"OOPERVALE" (skit)

' OOPERVALE'

In Malayalam we say,"Palam kadakkuvolam Narayana,Narayana;Palam kadannu kazhinjal Koorayana,Koorayana."It means,when we have a crisis,we earnestly pray to God to overcome the crisis,but when it's over,we reagard God with indifference,or forget Him altogether.I'm not sure whether this is True or false,but in our attitude to Time,it's entirely true.Some of us,who are absent-minded,lazy,careless or irresponsible,sometimes confront some situations in which we beg Time to be merciful and to be on our side,but,after solving the problem,we forget our benefactor until the next crisis erupts.

I call Time 'oopervale',which means GOD in Hindi.In Hindi films,some characters say,'sub oopervale ke hathom me hei'( fogive my poor Hindi).Have you ever noticed that Time's (clock) place on the wall in our homes is on par with that of Jesus Christ and the saints.Even if we don't call Time God,at least give him sainthood.When we raise our eyes to pray,Saint Time is also watching us.That's why I call him 'oopervale'.Some people explain their successes as a result of 'good timing'.

In my house,Time has occupied an honourable postion,in the form of clocks of different shapes and sizes on the wall,and various time pieces placed at strategic spots.All these are my wife's collections.Perhaps she wants to beat me in my strange but favourite collection of padlocks.(Mr Azhikath Ninan knows the whole story).Even though I don't give padlocks as gifts,Leelamma's favorite gift item is the clock.I think the clock is also an election symbol in india.With thousands of candidates in the fray,and all imaginable symbols having been exhausted,even the needle is an election symbol in India,especially for splinter parties.Anyway,the clock's (Time's) place is assured above or equal to others.Hence 'oopervale'or uppermost.

Sometimes I advise my wife,"Clocks are outdated.A cell phone can do the functions of a clock."

But she doesn't buy my suggestion.In Dubai she bought a watch because there was a special offer of a clock together with it.

Strange are the ways of our thinking.When there is drought,we pray for rain,and when the floods come,we pray for relief from it.When we wait for a train,we wish if it could arrive a few minutes earlier.On other occasions,when we are late for the train,we pray for its late arrival,if possible.

We always hear,'Time is running out','a race against Time',Time is money','Procastination is the thief of Time'etc. In the first two,it's nearly literal,ie we run alongside trains to find our seats;we race our cars to reach some destination before the deadline.unfortunately,some overspeeding motorists don't reach their destnations.The race against Time turns into a race against Death,where the latter emerges victorious.

Morning is the ideal time for prayer.In addition to praying to God in Heaven,I pray to St.Time or hereafter called 'oopervale',to show mercy on me.This is from 5.45 to 6.45 am,when I get ready to go to school.Don't think that I'm too lazy to wake up.Indeed I'm an early riser,at 4am or even before.From then upto 5.45,I'm in Kerala.By this I mean,I watch Malayalam Tv channels to see what's happening in our state.With very few malayalee friends around,Malyalam TV channels are the source of listening to Malayalam.From 5.45 to 6.45,a lot of things are to be done.We have to carry a lot of things in the car;breakfast,lunch,kudivellam,books,scripts etc etc.To make matters worse,the Tvm syndromme has hit here also.I mean the water shortage.Sometimes I have to collect some water from the borehole taps.All in all,I am on knife's edge,running here and there,occasionally looking at oopervale for mercy.Thanks to his blessings,I am never late at school,which is 35 kms away,but reachable in 30-35 minutes.School time starts at 7.30.

The oopervale is forgotten for the rest of the day,only to be remembered the next day,with the same devotion.

Today is the 9th of March in Kerala,but in reality,Kerala is 4 days behind the rest of the world because of the days lost due to bandhs,which caused unspeakable misery to the common people.Bandhs are anti-people,anti-progressive and anti-clockwise.It takes the country backwards,as against clockwise,which is normal and progressive.So let us call bandhs anticlockfoolish.

A TIME PIECE IN PIECES

In December 2009,I received a time piece as a gift from my Senior at the marking centre.She gave a Christmas card and a time piece to all the six markers in her group.Surely it was a token of appreciation for our punctuality and team work.Unfortunately,that time piece met a premature end.In the same month,my daughter Praveena,her husband Sibi and daughter Alyssa visited SA.Unnoticed by us,2 year-old Alyssa grabbed it,and dismantled it.The time piece ended in many pieces,and ,as usual,as a grandfather,I had to pick up the pieces.The oopervales were safe because they were out of reach of the toddler.

To coclude,I shall recommend a daily prayer to oopervale (St.Time)

Dear St.Time,be always with me
Wake me up early,free me from laziness,
Carelessness and indifference
Give me the wisdom to do things in time
Teach me to do things orderly
In order to reach my destination on time
Protect me from bandhs and hartals
From evertything that upsets you
From drunkenness,too much TV
Too much food and too much sleep
Help me to depart early
Together with you,hand in hand
Be my guardian angel
Jog with me,side by side
Not ahead,because I'm too weak
And slow,to keep pace with you.
Don't leave me behind,I beg you.