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GRAND CLEARANCE SALE ( SATIRE )

     
                         GRAND  CLEARANCE  SALE  ( SATIRE )

    Kindy  Chor's  Goonda  Services ( Pvt Ltd ), in association  with Gutternet  News
Channel  proudly   announces  a  grand  clearance  sale of unused items  resulting  from
the  Secretarait  siege  fiasco that  was staged in Thattippupuram  on 13 August.The
sale  will  start  tomorrow  in  our premises  at 2,  Lathicharge Avenue. All  are welcome.

    PRICE  LIST
 
1    Gutternet   products

                 OLD   PRICE                                        NEW   PRICE

        Plain  lies   per bag   Rs  2000-00                    200-00
        Jumbo   lies               Rs   2500-00                   225-00
        Lie  Vada                   Rs   1600-00                  600-00
        Lie  oothappam          Rs  1200-00                   120-00
        Lie  pollichathu          Rs  5000-00                    550-00
        Rumour                      Rs   4000-00                   800-00
        Speculation (raw )      Rs   3500-00                   325-00
        Speculation ( roast )   Rs  2500-00                    300-00
      Hidden  camera (ladies) Rs  30000-00                3000-00
      Hidden  camera (gents)  Rs 25000-00                 2500-00

    2  Stones  ( for stone throwing, per load )

        unda  kallu                   Rs 5000-00                  550-00
        cheelu  kallu                 Rs 4000-00                  425-00
        mixed kallu                  Rs 3000-00                  350-00 
 
    3 Liquid  items

     Tar ( per 10 litre can )       1000-00                 100-00
     Mud                                    500-00                  55-00

4  Thery ( foul  language )

    Thery   nadan                2500-00                    250-00
    Kannoor  style              3500-00                     325-00
    Alapuzha                       2550-00                    245-00
    Thery  clean                  3500-00                    325-00
    Thery Kottayam            4500-00                    445-00
 Pala  style ( rubberised)    6000-00                   675-00
  Poonjar   style                  5000-00                    550-00
Thery  ( Western )
eg  bastard, f...k etc           7500-00                     775-00

Thery    ( sour )                 6000-00                     660-00

N.B  Charges  for thery is per hour.

5.  All kinds  of  black flags , XXL to  mini   available .Free  training  given  for
   black  flag  display. Broken  lathis, broken  shields, broken helmets ,damaged
barricades, chappals ( mixed pairs)  also  available.

6.  All  food items abandoned by the agitators, except onion, are  available
     at  50 %  discount.

Home  delivery *     Free  transport *  free  quotations

RUSH  NOW ! LIMITED  STOCKS *
     
 
        

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