The Age of Scandals ( Satire )
In the year 2030, Thattippu Nadu ( formerly known as Kerala ) was ruled by the CDF ( Corrupt
Democratic Front ) and the ODF ( Outdated Democratic Front ) sat in the Opposition. It is a falsehood to say that the ODF sat in the Opposition, because ,in fact, they usually stood in the assembly in protest, or walked out. The Chief Minister of that period was Mr Chacko Thommen, and it was the third year of his stewardship of Thattippu Nadu.
Power changed hands between the two Fronts every five years because the people became bored and
disillusioned with the incumbents and threw them out. But the misery, insecurity and hardships of
the' am admi ' continued regardless of whoever was in power. Actually power was in the hands of
Goondas, Mafias and lobbies, who were a law unto themselves, and held the whole Thattippu Nadu
to ransom. The Goonda bosses were so audacious that, sometimes even Chief minister Chacko was
summoned by some of them for a round of scolding.
The Channels had mushroomed to such an extent that no one knew the exact number of them.Each Channel had a variety of sections under them, of which the Scandal Channel was the most popular.
These channels provided entertainment for the viewers, and served as a forum for settling old scores by both the CDF and the ODF.
Chief Minister Chacko was many times targeted by the ODF, who accused him of corruption,
bribery, nepotism etc, but he weathered all the storms by pre-empting his enemies' dirty tricks.
He was a tough survivor, like a cat with nine lives. He had many enemies in his own party,who
secretly collaborated with ODF, but Chacko survived against all odds.
On 13 August 2030, Chacko's misfortune began. He was on his way to Kottayam, when bad luck
struck. At a place called Chelikuzhi, (eg Kanjikuzhy ) the right tyre of his Mercedes plunged into a
large pothole, and splashed the muddy water onto some college girls who were walking on the footpath. The driver, Pappan, had underestimated the depth of the pothole, which was full of water.
One of the girls, Bindu, was very furious and reacted angrily, shouting and pointing at the Chief
Minister :
'' What have you done? Can't you see that aam admis are walking on the footpath. You have
tarnished my image in the public eye."
Mukhyan ( CM ) Chacko emerged from the car with his characteristic broad smile,
apologised to Bindu and wiped the mud from her wet churidar. This didn't pacify her. She continued,
'' These potholes are due to your government's incompetence ,negligence and corruption.
Yesterday,a lady on a bike fell into this death trap, and is fighting for her life . As CM, you
are accountable for this mess.''
Chacko said, " I shall look into the matter as a priority. I shall give a lift to the Government
Guest house, where you can change your dress. I can buy you a new set .''
The whole incident was being recorded and shown as BREAKING NEWS on
different Scandal Channels.
Bindu declined the offer of the CM, and went home,but she was followed by hordes of correspondents. The Channels reported the incident in different ways, according to their political
leanings. Gutternet Scandal Channel reported the incident with the headlines ' Brave college girl
chastises the Chief Minister'.
Bindu became an instant celebrity. Her home was under siege by the media, admirers, well-wishers
and ODF supporters. Channels fought to get a glimpse of her, and for an interview.
After some time, a new bombshell was dropped. Bindu met the media and said.
'' Chief Minister Chacko touched me without my permission.''
The news spread like wildfire throughout the state, and there was a spontaneous outburst of
public anger, fuelled by ODF supporters, who burnt effigies of Chacko, held protest marches,
stoned TNRTC buses and clashed with the police.The leader of the opposition at that time was
Mr K.S. Kesavanandan, popularly known as K.S. He demanded the immediate resignation of
Chief Minister Chacko.
Why Bindu hadn't initially made the allegation of abuse remained a mystery. The Channels began
to show graphic details of the incident, focussing on the movements of Chacko's fingers on Bindu's
body ,like a slow-motion replay in a cricket match to determine whether a player was 'in' or 'out'.
An arrow was flashed on Chacko's fingers, and the movements were shown in slow motion, back and
forth,repeatedly, while debates, expert opinions, people's reactions
etc raged on round the clock.
Chacko denied the allegations as absurd and politically motivated . He reiterated that he was only
trying to help the girl. But his arguments fell on deaf ears.
The comments of the public went like this:
" Chacko pressed too hard while wiping the mud from Bindu's churidar."
" He took unusually long time to wipe the mud.''
'' He touched where there was no mud.''
" Chacko invited the girl to the guest house with evil intentions.''
" No. This is pure nonsense. It was a touch of fatherly affection and tenderness.''
" Chacko should be arrested immediately on nonbailable charges of women abuse.'
Some disgruntled members of Chacko's own party demanded his resignation on ' moral grounds'.
But their intention was to ground him like an aircraft hit by an eagle.
Meanwhile, another revelation boosted the entertainment, and compounded the problems of Chacko.
A Channel revealed that Chacko's driver had obtained his Driver's Licence through fraud and
corruption. He had taken advantage of the CM's name.
The scandal raged for one week, and then the whole incident took a dramatic twist, with Bindu
defusing the bombshell she had dropped. She said,
'' It was all due to a misunderstanding. This chapter is closed. The Honourable Chief Minister,
Sri Chacko ,is a father figure for me. No questions ,please."
On the same day, another scandal erupted. This time, the ODF was on the receiving end. KS's son,
Sadacharadass, was the eye of the storm. He had seduced a serial actress, Smitha, promised to marry
her, but later dumped her. The girl had recorded all the bedroom scenes, and sold the footage to a Scandal Channel. The newsreader of that Channel started the breaking news:
" We are in possession of lengthy footage of the sexual exploits of Sadacharadass, son of the Leader of the Opposition, Mr KS.''
In Cliff House, Chief Minister Chacko sat back, and giggled.
In the year 2030, Thattippu Nadu ( formerly known as Kerala ) was ruled by the CDF ( Corrupt
Democratic Front ) and the ODF ( Outdated Democratic Front ) sat in the Opposition. It is a falsehood to say that the ODF sat in the Opposition, because ,in fact, they usually stood in the assembly in protest, or walked out. The Chief Minister of that period was Mr Chacko Thommen, and it was the third year of his stewardship of Thattippu Nadu.
Power changed hands between the two Fronts every five years because the people became bored and
disillusioned with the incumbents and threw them out. But the misery, insecurity and hardships of
the' am admi ' continued regardless of whoever was in power. Actually power was in the hands of
Goondas, Mafias and lobbies, who were a law unto themselves, and held the whole Thattippu Nadu
to ransom. The Goonda bosses were so audacious that, sometimes even Chief minister Chacko was
summoned by some of them for a round of scolding.
The Channels had mushroomed to such an extent that no one knew the exact number of them.Each Channel had a variety of sections under them, of which the Scandal Channel was the most popular.
These channels provided entertainment for the viewers, and served as a forum for settling old scores by both the CDF and the ODF.
Chief Minister Chacko was many times targeted by the ODF, who accused him of corruption,
bribery, nepotism etc, but he weathered all the storms by pre-empting his enemies' dirty tricks.
He was a tough survivor, like a cat with nine lives. He had many enemies in his own party,who
secretly collaborated with ODF, but Chacko survived against all odds.
On 13 August 2030, Chacko's misfortune began. He was on his way to Kottayam, when bad luck
struck. At a place called Chelikuzhi, (eg Kanjikuzhy ) the right tyre of his Mercedes plunged into a
large pothole, and splashed the muddy water onto some college girls who were walking on the footpath. The driver, Pappan, had underestimated the depth of the pothole, which was full of water.
One of the girls, Bindu, was very furious and reacted angrily, shouting and pointing at the Chief
Minister :
'' What have you done? Can't you see that aam admis are walking on the footpath. You have
tarnished my image in the public eye."
Mukhyan ( CM ) Chacko emerged from the car with his characteristic broad smile,
apologised to Bindu and wiped the mud from her wet churidar. This didn't pacify her. She continued,
'' These potholes are due to your government's incompetence ,negligence and corruption.
Yesterday,a lady on a bike fell into this death trap, and is fighting for her life . As CM, you
are accountable for this mess.''
Chacko said, " I shall look into the matter as a priority. I shall give a lift to the Government
Guest house, where you can change your dress. I can buy you a new set .''
The whole incident was being recorded and shown as BREAKING NEWS on
different Scandal Channels.
Bindu declined the offer of the CM, and went home,but she was followed by hordes of correspondents. The Channels reported the incident in different ways, according to their political
leanings. Gutternet Scandal Channel reported the incident with the headlines ' Brave college girl
chastises the Chief Minister'.
Bindu became an instant celebrity. Her home was under siege by the media, admirers, well-wishers
and ODF supporters. Channels fought to get a glimpse of her, and for an interview.
After some time, a new bombshell was dropped. Bindu met the media and said.
'' Chief Minister Chacko touched me without my permission.''
The news spread like wildfire throughout the state, and there was a spontaneous outburst of
public anger, fuelled by ODF supporters, who burnt effigies of Chacko, held protest marches,
stoned TNRTC buses and clashed with the police.The leader of the opposition at that time was
Mr K.S. Kesavanandan, popularly known as K.S. He demanded the immediate resignation of
Chief Minister Chacko.
Why Bindu hadn't initially made the allegation of abuse remained a mystery. The Channels began
to show graphic details of the incident, focussing on the movements of Chacko's fingers on Bindu's
body ,like a slow-motion replay in a cricket match to determine whether a player was 'in' or 'out'.
An arrow was flashed on Chacko's fingers, and the movements were shown in slow motion, back and
forth,repeatedly, while debates, expert opinions, people's reactions
Chacko denied the allegations as absurd and politically motivated . He reiterated that he was only
trying to help the girl. But his arguments fell on deaf ears.
The comments of the public went like this:
" Chacko pressed too hard while wiping the mud from Bindu's churidar."
" He took unusually long time to wipe the mud.''
'' He touched where there was no mud.''
" Chacko invited the girl to the guest house with evil intentions.''
" No. This is pure nonsense. It was a touch of fatherly affection and tenderness.''
" Chacko should be arrested immediately on nonbailable charges of women abuse.'
Some disgruntled members of Chacko's own party demanded his resignation on ' moral grounds'.
But their intention was to ground him like an aircraft hit by an eagle.
Meanwhile, another revelation boosted the entertainment, and compounded the problems of Chacko.
A Channel revealed that Chacko's driver had obtained his Driver's Licence through fraud and
corruption. He had taken advantage of the CM's name.
The scandal raged for one week, and then the whole incident took a dramatic twist, with Bindu
defusing the bombshell she had dropped. She said,
'' It was all due to a misunderstanding. This chapter is closed. The Honourable Chief Minister,
Sri Chacko ,is a father figure for me. No questions ,please."
On the same day, another scandal erupted. This time, the ODF was on the receiving end. KS's son,
Sadacharadass, was the eye of the storm. He had seduced a serial actress, Smitha, promised to marry
her, but later dumped her. The girl had recorded all the bedroom scenes, and sold the footage to a Scandal Channel. The newsreader of that Channel started the breaking news:
" We are in possession of lengthy footage of the sexual exploits of Sadacharadass, son of the Leader of the Opposition, Mr KS.''
In Cliff House, Chief Minister Chacko sat back, and giggled.
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