kurian's New Age Blog

                                       GRAND  EXCHANGE FESTIVAL  ( SATIRE ) Due  to the skyrocketing  prices of onions and rotten eggs, Kindi  Chor's  Goonda Services ( Pvt Ltd )  is launching  a Grand Exchange  Mela  tomorrow ,in our premises  opposite  Secretariat, Thattippupuram. All  are  welcome. ITEMS   FOR  EXCHANGE 1 rotten  egg                                1 onion 5 rotten  tomatoes                        1 onion 10 rotten  bananas                        1 onion 4 rotten cabbages                         1 onion 5 rotten  apples                             1 onion 1  US dollar                                  1 onion AGITATOR'S  KINDI  KIT This  attractive package, very popular with agitators, is available  at  50% discount. The package includes  10 rotten eggs, 100  stones, 10 black flags, 2 Oommen Chandy/ Saritha  T shirts, and above all, 2 Kindi ( kundi? )  pads to soften lathi adi. BESTSELLERS  BY  OUR  FOUNDER DR KINDI  CHOR The bestselle

                THE   PSYCHOLOGY  OF THATTIPPU (OPINION )                      Duncan         There's no art          To find the mind's construction in the face:          He was a gentleman  on whom I built          An absolute  trust   ( Macbeth  Act I Scene 4 )         These  words of King Duncan, in Shakespeare's play, Macbeth,perfectly   fits all cases of fraud or betrayal. A fraud is a betrayal .In the play, Macbeth,  King Duncan is not talking about a fraud case involving money, but about  matters of state, in which ,one of his trusted nobles ,the Thane of Cawdor had sided with foreign forces to overthrow him. In fraud, as well as in treason,the  basis is a betrayal of trust. In Kerala, "thattippu' is the key word on everybody's mind and lips.It's high time  Kerala is renamed 'Thattippudesh". Recently, I pondered at length about a suitable name for our beloved state, where the state of affairs is now far from promising. Bl

                               GRAND  CLEARANCE  SALE  ( SATIRE )     Kindy  Chor's  Goonda  Services ( Pvt Ltd ), in association  with Gutternet  News Channel  proudly   announces  a  grand  clearance  sale of unused items  resulting  from the  Secretarait  siege  fiasco that  was staged in Thattippupuram  on 13 August.The sale  will  start  tomorrow  in  our premises  at 2,  Lathicharge Avenue. All  are welcome.     PRICE  LIST   1    Gutternet   products                  OLD   PRICE                                        NEW   PRICE         Plain  lies   per bag   Rs  2000-00                    200-00         Jumbo   lies               Rs   2500-00                   225-00         Lie  Vada                   Rs   1600-00                  600-00         Lie  oothappam          Rs  1200-00                   120-00         Lie  pollichathu          Rs  5000-00                    550-00         Rumour                      Rs   4000-00                   800-00   

                     The  Gutter Channel  Asianet  ( opinion ) This morning I watched  a sentence on Asianet TV screen ,which read:   " Solar  thattippu kesil  prathiyaya Ommen Chandiyude  sahayi  aayirunna  Joppante... This is the utter gutter style  developed by Asianet News Channel, which has become  a total disgrace to TV  journalism.For about two months, this channel  has been desperately trying to  tarnish the image of Oommen  Chandy, with little impact  on discerning  viewers.But  their dirty  tactics and dirty tricks  have huge impact on ignorant viewers. The above sentence is carefully  calculated and written to appear as if Oommen  Chandy  has already  been  charged. The gutter channel has been in the forefront to  humiliate  Oommen  Chandy. What  is the motive behind  Asianet's   overenthusiasm  to denigrate the name of Oommen Chandy? They spread lies about him, about his family and relatives. They spread lies, and do not broadcast the other side o

      URGENTLY  REQUIRED : GOONDAS ( SATIRE )   Kindy  Chor's  Goonda  Services ( Pvt Ltd ) invites  qualified and experienced goondas to be deployed  by  the LDF  on  12 August  2013, to blockade  the State Secretariat and to intimidate  the general  public. Interested goondas please report  for walk-in interview  at  our offices  opposite  the Secretariat immediately. QUALIFICATIONS  AND  EXPERIENCE  *  B. A ( Bachelor  of Anarchy ) with Goondaism  and  Thuggery  as subsidiaries. *  Candidates with  experience in the following  disciplines  will have preference. *  Stone-pelting *  bomb making  *  car- smashing  *  arson *  masked  armed     robbery * foul  language *  51-cut  head chopping *  assault *  battery * Free  insurance and immediate treatment  for injuries ( chathavu  and odivu )    available. Applicants  with  criminal  records will have added  weightage. Our  website : www goonda.com Walk in directly  at : Kindi  Chor's  Goonda  Servic

                             FUTURE   ADVERTISEMENT  - 2   (  SATIRE)    KINDI   CHOR'S  GOONDA   SERVICES  ( Recognised  by  Thattippudesh  Government)    In  response  to huge  public  demand , we are  shifting to our newly-built  complex,   opposite  Secretariat, Thattippupuram, ( formerly  known as Thiruvananthapuram ) ,   Thattippudesh  (  formerly  known as Kerala ). The new complex is a state-of-the art    four storey building, covering  50000 square feet area.   SERVICES   OFFERED       All  kinds of  Goonda activities  undertaken, with professional  perfection, at  reasonable  rates. A special  discount of  10% is  offered  for  all  our services ,to celebrate our  opening  on 3rd  August   2013. Our  services include  the following :   Assault, battery  ( not car battery ), stone -pelting, nadan bomb making, effigy burning,  black  flag  display, foul language ( pulicha  theri),car-smashing, hand-chopping ( kaivettu)  etc. Quotation  jobs also  undertak